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Fatherly Pearls of Wisdom: Defending Your Honour with Self Defence

  • idealmike Level X3
    • 19

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    I remember when my dad once told me that how I could defend myself, and my honour, or even my dates honour with self defence. Because sometimes in life, you can come up against some unsavoury characters and while you shouldn't ever incite violence, you can use it to defend yourself with legally and in a fair and justified way.

    4. Want to defend your dates honour who's just been insulted by someone? That's great but never hit someone unless they are posing an immediate threat to your safety and it's done in "self defence".
    I never realised until I was older that it's actually "legal" to hit someone if it's in self defence. So, say someone comes and steps up to me threateningly as if to punch me or something and I then hit them, that would be okay as that's in "self defence" and I wouldn't be charged with assaulting by beating for doing that. Now if I just went up to someone and just hit them then that would be assault and I should be tried and charged for that. But when my old man told me this once I never really paid much attention to it. It wasn't until later on that I got into some "trouble" with a group of local lads that were just looking for some trouble while out with my date and throwing jeers, sneers and insults at us just so they could win some respect or stripes with their mates.

    And me being me, I stood up for myself and to defend my dates honour and told them in basic words what a bunch of complete mindless morons I thought they were and that they weren't impressing anyone. One of them walked up to me quite quickly as though he was going to hit me or start a fight with me or something. And I was quite scared as I was on my own but I didn't want to look like a weed in front of my date so I done what I was told and defended myself by punching him square on the nose and knocking him down on the ground. To which he never expected at all and all his mates was just as stunned and shocked by it as he was.

    Now I was thinking, oh great, here we go I'm going to get it now, but he just got up and walked off, tail between his legs and that was the end of the matter as far as I thought. It was only later on when the police turned up on my door asking me questions about what happened. Apparently they thought they would get me into some trouble and try to sue me for assault or something. It was then that I explained to the office that it was done in self defence to protect myself from what I thought was going to be an assault on me.

    None of it was caught on camera (this was the early 90's and there wasn't many cameras about back then). However, my date did bear witness to it and gave the same story as I did and after this, I never heard anything more from it. I think what happened is the officer believed me since I wasn't ever in trouble with the police for anything before and the other guys were and were known for it. So he must have told them that if it ever went to court they would be the ones that were charged and not me.

    And that's such a great life hack to know! That you can hit someone if it's in self defence. I never advocate hitting anyone even as a last resort. It's just childish really. It's very barbaric to just hit a person even if they are majorly annoying you to hell. And you know, I'm a sophisticated gentleman not a caveman! I'm not a brute, thug or lout. It's just not something I go around doing.

    But you can, if you are in an immediate threat, hit someone to protect yourself. And that's seen as self defence so it can be justified. Besides, I grew up practising Tae Kwon Do and that's a martial art that teaches you about the ways of peace and that violence is only ever a resort you should turn to to defend yourself with.

    What about you? Have you ever defended yourself, and your dates honour with self defence?
    #Lifehack #Self #defence Life Hacks
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    fishmonk

    fishmonk

    I personally have defended myself with knowledge of martial arts from a snatch thief. He snatched my friend's purse so I ran after him. We got into sort of a fight. Thank goodness I was able to use some techniques from Taekwondo and Judo to stop the guy. I handed the guy to the police with the help of some bystanders. That incident happened more than 5 years ago.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    augusta

    augusta

    I used to do more of self-defense through fighting years ago, until almost damage a girl face I had to stop because it wasn't an easy case for me and my parents.I had sleepless night praying that she gets better, she was in the hospital for a week and was still in and out of the hospital for 3 more weeks. The good thing is that she was the one at fault.But now I defend myself with either peace or silence.Violence is a bad weapon to use in my own opinion.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    fulstaf

    fulstaf

    I'm fortunate having an old school upbringing, when I was young I used to fight a lot, even when we were playing, we were fighting, and my mother punishes me not for fighting, but for not defending myself properly, she used to say "look what they have done to you!" Now that I'm a grown up men, I'm always ready for any challenge, and I have defended myself on many occasion, be it by policy or violence, a lot of men today don't even consider the possibility of fighting.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    dhervas

    dhervas

    Man, I don't know where you people come from, but I'm from a not-very-friendly place, to put it mildly, and even here there's no need to fist fight anyone. I find it surprising that you need to "fight to defend your honor" or things like that. Grown men don't fight in the first place, and if your honor is founded in your ability to kick someone's ass, then you have a very weak concept of honor to start with. Letting yourself be bullied is of course not an option, but a strong personality and sense of self-worth will take you much further than a punch in the face. Just my opinion.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    JoeMilford

    JoeMilford

    I can't remember who said it, but I once heard the quote that, "He is the strongest warrior who never has to draw his sword". I prefer to use my wits in situations where I am dealing with a difficult person. Of course, if the violence escalates, and I have to physically defend myself, I will, but I do everything I can up until that point to avoid such altercations. I like to think that I have matured over the years; when I was younger, I was angrier, and I would fight at the drop of a hat. These days, I am hoping that my wisdom and cooler head will prevail.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    overcast

    overcast

    I think there is very thin line between the ego and the self defense. You can see that people with ego usually have their share of the issues. So they need to understand where the respect stands. And that's how it should be handled. I think people need to learn about the self defense if possible. I have learned that people who are not understanding that part end up making a lot of issues around. That is what I have noticed these days.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    preciseone

    preciseone

    I was in the United States Army for 20 years and I can understand someone wanting to have the knowledge to defend their self. But I really do not see the need for violence or defending the honor of a date. The best way to defend your dates honor is by simply walking away from the situation without making things worst. The last thing I would want to do is find me and my date having weapons drawn on us because my ego allowed me to put us in that sort of situation.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    overcast

    overcast

    Reasonable. I guess depending on the peoples perspective they take chances. Some of the time they are more into the argument and fight. And some of the time they can be good for the defense of their own self. I guess for each one of us that could be different scenario. I learned to pick and choose my battles. And this way I am learning to find my way towards things around.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    AmieBotella

    AmieBotella

    Being a woman and have experienced harassment on several occasions by myself from strangers, I can say that I am glad when some random concerned guy stood up for me against the offender but at the same time I hope to God things won't escalate to violence. But at the moment, when I think, the situation calls for it, I wouldn't hesitate to fight back and stop the offender and help the defender. But that should be the last resort. I always believe violence never really solve the problem but it can certainly halt a much more bigger problem when you do it defensively.

    The best way to defend a loved one's/ date's honor when being tested is to just ignore the whole situation and remove yourselves away from the situation.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    Judas2018

    Judas2018

    Never throw a punch unless you're attacked first in a social situation. It lets people know you will and can defend yourself but you're also not a goon or violent person. Once attacked, you are allowed to retaliate. You don't lose rep points because of that. Don't overdo it though. Sometimes, simply blocking a person's attack and putting them in a hold will suffice. Now of course... if you're walking down the street with a date or a friend and some guys come out of an alley, armed and with bad intentions. All of those bets are off. That's a life or death scenario right there.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    PedroP

    PedroP

    Well, I have been in a few street fights and have taken up martial arts after that. My best advice is to learn some self-defense and do it soon just in case you need it. Always better to have it and not need it than the other way around
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    jaymish

    jaymish

    Are you actually glorifying hitting someone in self-defense? What you should bring to everyone's attention is that the law is not universal and is different in some countries. In Denmark, for example, a girl was charged for pepper spraying a man that was about to assault her sexually. Self-defense didn't work in this case.

    In some countries, self-defense applies only when you couldn't safely retreat from the situation. In your case, you hit out at the guy because 'you didn't want to look like a weed' to your date. I'll also remind you self-defense was not envisioned for cases like yours. It was made for situations where people feel they are in danger and the danger could prove fatal. E.g In cases of domestic abuse.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    overcast

    overcast

    I think the issue with self defense is very tricky. Some of the time women can be paranoid. I remember one woman sprayed on a guy who was selling stuff on road and selling the stuff person by person. So that's something we have to think of when it comes to self defense. People have to think of assault and the self defense cases very seriously. And that means we can't be doing a lot on that part.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    jaymish

    jaymish

    @ overcast I don't really think that women are paranoid. I think they know that they are vulnerable and have learned to take care of themselves. With all the rape and the assault of women, they have learned to be on the defensive always which is a big indictment on our society.

    In the above example, you have given of a woman who sprayed a person selling did he touch her in an inappropriate way? Did he assault her verbally or whistle at her? Assault is more than physical it can also be verbal. However, you are right there is a thin line between self-defense and assault.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    gelotologist

    gelotologist

    No, never been to a fight whenever my girl and I go on a date, like whenever I do get to a fight people around always break it so it ended up like just talking sh*t to one another rather than doing the actual fist fight. I remember when I was in high school when our P.E. teacher told us to learn self defense in every other way, so you can protect not just yourself but also the people around you that you cared for.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    mildredtabitha

    mildredtabitha

    I have learned something useful today. I am never the one to start a fight but I can promise to hit back when a finger is laid on me.

    The last time I fought was back in school and I also did it for self defense. Obvious I shocked everyone because they thought a quiet girl can't know how to fight lol.

    I realized people who insult you only know how to throw words but they can't fight.
    9 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    Kakashi2020

    Kakashi2020

    I learned self defense at a very young age as a grade school student. The school I'm studying in has a lot of martial arts clubs and electives and basic Karate and Arnis or Stick Fighting is also taught in P.E. class. I got my Black Belt in traditional Shotokan Karate when I was 22 years old, I had to stay as a brown belt for 4 years because the promotion exam was quite tough, sparring full contact with 3 invited black belts for 60 seconds each without protective paddings or head gear. The rules where simole, no head and groin kicks, strikes or punches that's it. If you survive fighting the 3 black belts one by one with atleast 1 clear hit on each then you get promoted. If not then you get to fight again after 6 months. I passed with a couple of broken ribs, a fractured arm and a busted leg. After that we celebrated and that means I have to buy lots of beer and food. I also have several lower belts in Isshin-ryu Karate, Judo, Aikido and Kyokushin which I think has the hardest training. I'm also an instructor in Arnis or Kali as they call it in other places and I trained with the best Fencing Master here in the Philippines. The only drawback of knowing how to fight is that in my younger years I get into fights all the time.
    8 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    Vazinbon

    Vazinbon

    Everyone has the right to self-defense. Many people have heard about this, at least from films or books. Everyone needs to know, because criminals can attack any person, his family or home. No one is protected from this. But, how should one act to protect oneself and, at the same time, not commit a crime or an administrative violation?
    6 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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