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Fatherly Pearls of Wisdom: Fake it Until You Make it! Confidence Comes After..

  • idealmike Level X3
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    Fatherly Pearls of Wisdom: Fake it Until You Make it! Confidence Comes After..

    Not feeling confident in your approach? Don't ever show it, fake it until you make it! Confidence will come after this.
    How true is the statement that if you fake it you'll make it? Well that's not actually the statement. The statement is "fake it until you make it". And how true is that? Well it's pretty true since that's the reason why they say it! And it's a real life hack to live by as well! True words of wisdom that are good and worthy to learn and adopt and apply in your own life!

    There's probably been many times in your life when you've felt not very confident about something. Whether it's approaching someone like a girl to ask for a date. Or someone else to ask for something else. Or when you've just been put on the spot and you have all eyes on you. Making you feel like you want the ground to just swallow you up and kill you! LOL

    But the best thing to do in these cases is not to cower away and make up some excuse not to do it. But rather to man up and eat your excuses for breakfast! Tell yourself, no, that's just negativity talking, I'm not going to listen to you, I'm going to better myself and do this because I am a confident person.

    And guess what? When you do do that, confidence really does come after it! Because you'll be feeling great about yourself that you found the confidence within yourself to do it. You surprised yourself because you was on shaky ground with this small voice in one ear saying, "you'll never do it" or "you're not good enough". And you ignored those and proved them otherwise! Fatherly Pearls of Wisdom: Fake it Until You Make it! Confidence Comes After..

    What about you? Have you ever faked it until you made it? Has there ever been a time in your life where you felt like you didn't have much confidence in yourself to do something. But then ignored that feeling and done it with a faked confidence as though you was confident you could do it all along? How did it turn out for you? Did you find you got more confidence from this after?

    That's generally what happens when you fake it until you make it! Fatherly Pearls of Wisdom: Fake it Until You Make it! Confidence Comes After..

    #Wisdom #Lifehack #Confidence Life Hacks
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    ktparker2

    ktparker2

    I was working for an Educational Technology company and was sent to a leadership conference to demo our product in the exhibit hall. My new regional manager accompanied me had only been with the company for a few days and wasn't much help to me. The equipment we were setting up was giving us trouble so I had on casual clothes in the scorching Georgia heat as I worked to get it set-up before the participants were released to the exhibit hall.

    Someone from the conference team came over to ask that one of us speak to close out the opening session. Our company was a diamond sponsor and had reached a milestone of one million products sold. They were giving us a chance to address the crowd and generate business. My regional who was dressed in a suit switched places with me at the entrance to the stage, shoved me lightly in the back and closed the door behind me. There was nowhere for me to go but up on stage where I would have to speak to hundreds of school district superintendents and CIO's. Sweaty, dirty with my knees knocking I had no choice but to walk up to the mic and address the crowd. To make things worse the whole thing was being filmed!

    I began to speak with my chin held high looking out at the camera. I was so afraid I couldn't hear my own voice or remember what I said. When I finished the crowd applauded. I walked off the stage with my shoulders back and head up high. I exited the stage and walked quickly out the building towards my hotel room across the parking lot. Once inside I cried and cried from embarrassment. Then I called my best friend who told me to pull myself together get dressed and get back out there. When I returned our booth was full of customers asking about the products I mentioned in my speech. After that, I I had the confidence to speak anywhere, at any time, about anything!!
    8 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    Happyflowerlady

    Happyflowerlady

    I think that this does actually work, providing that you give it a chance to work. Sometimes, the change happens a bit at a time, just like learning almost anything takes time.
    When I got a job selling life insurance, I was terrified to go up and knock on people's doors. I would put it off as long as possible and finally force myself to go out and see people. Once I was in the door, I was fine talking to people about their insurance coverage and what their needs were, it was just getting up to that door and introducing myself that was so hard for me to do.
    My manager was one of the best sales people in the company, and he had a lot of confidence walking up to someone's door and introducing himself. So, what i would do when I got out of my car to walk up to the house and knock was to say to myself, "I am Bruce walking confidently up to the house" and I would do my best to imitate Bruce's confident stride up to the door.
    I found that when I "became Bruce" in my mind, it helped immensely, and gradually, I didn't have to pretend in order to walk up and knock on some stranger's door.
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    thisfreespirit

    thisfreespirit

    Positive self talk is definitely a good way to bolster your own confidence and achieve much more than you initially though you could do. The whole "fake it until you make it" motto does just that! I've definitely had times when I've used, especially when in a new classroom teaching situation. Teachers don't always have all the answers. There are topics and subjects that I struggle with, but you never let the kids know that... not totally anyhow. Showing confidence is the best way to get started. If you seem that you aren't confident, no one will listen and then you don't even have the chance to get started.
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    fulstaf

    fulstaf

    One thing is for sure, is that confidence doesn't come first as you mentioned, my approach is to jump on any new field knowing nothing and start gaining confidence bit by bit and keep a low profile not letting anybody know that I'm a complete newbie, I've never been discouraged by anybody, but I prefer to save myself any pointless arguments.
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    PedroP

    PedroP

    This has been a personal motto for some time. Many time in my life I had to do things that nobody taught me how and this is how I handled it. In life, you got to act like you know it until you actually have it for sure "If you're not confident fake it. Nobody will know the difference anyway"
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    Barida

    Barida

    I think this has to be with positive thinking and taking actions to back up those thoughts we have since without actions, all our thoughts are mere wishes. I used to have this fear of talking with others while on a social gathering and sometimes this even affects my confidence in a way that I rarely express how I feel to others or how I think they should have done something in the way or the other.

    So, I started faking to be confident how talking to them without fear after reading the 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene that outlined in details some actions one can take to grab power and influence over others. Since I started faking some of those behaviours, it has helped me to master them in such a way that those characters have ended up becoming part of me and part of how I act in life.

    I still stand on that point that anyone that wants to overcome some personal challenges should 'fake it till he makes it'.
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    marbertism

    marbertism

    'Fake it until you make it' is a statement equivalent to psychological repression of external distractions which will then lead you to your focus. This actually works. This means you have to habitualize something that you want to be and play with your psychology so that it will suddenly become your practice. There's a study quantifying to what extent would you fake it until you make it. Incredibly, it would just take 21 days.
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    Markql02

    Markql02

    It caught my attention the line "Fake it until you make it". I don't have confidence to talk to other people and even in an job interviews. But I need a job so that I can pay my bills when I am in a situation that my confidence is the only thing that holding me back. I keep on pushing and fake my emotion until I make it. Fake it until you make is my motto.
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    Judas2018

    Judas2018

    Fake it till you make it for most people 18 to 35 usually means lie about how well you're doing to your parents or people you have just met. Tell them how well everything is going and how you've got big things lined up, when in reality you can barely afford food and you're still waiting for your "big break" at work or in your career.
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    PedroP

    PedroP

    Well, there is a trade-off to this. I got so used to faking till I made that it came a time in my life that all I did was faking and it wasn't pretty. The advice is great but everything should be taken with a grain of salt
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    Judas2018

    Judas2018

    I don't agree with the thesis behind Fake It Till You Make It. But I know what it means, at least here in the states. But some of the aspect behind it is don't let people know you're in trouble. To avoid pity, or people constantly wanting to help you out or hammering you for how well you're not doing or what you're not doing. I think it's ok to implement this idea if you have parents who worry. But if your friends are struggling too> Then just be honest. You'd fit right in with them at the end of the day, so nothing to lose.
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    PedroP

    PedroP

    The only problem with your point of view is that panic just like sorrow is contagious. If you let yourself be contaminated by those negative feelings you'll have a hard time getting over them. But I can definitely understand where you're coming from. Been there myself
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    preciseone

    preciseone

    I believe in the phrase "fake it til you make it". I say this because while you are sitting there lost, you are learning as well. This phrase works best for those of us that learn really fast. And in the long run we will blow past the individual that trained us, and they will be so lost that it is ridiculous.
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    jaymish

    jaymish

    I totally agree with the saying, fake it until you make it. This applies to everything in life. School can only teach you ,so much and even that is mostly theoretical. Almost everything you do in life, has to be learnt from practically doing and no one can teach you that. I had a job that I knew nothing about, no experience whatsoever.I pretended that I knew what I was doing. Every time I was assigned to do something, I just consulted Angel Google and got it done. And I did it, I became an expert just by faking it.As Tony Robbins says' progress is what builds confidence, getting things done is what builds confidence' to this I would add just do it, even if you fail, what have you got ,to lose? If you don't try,you don't gain anything ,even the lesson from failure. This applies to every area of our lives.
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    Pixie06

    Pixie06

    Some years back I had a self-confidence problem. I was so pessimistic about life. I got many good job offers which I refused mainly because I thought that I wouldn't be able to do such jobs. With much struggles and with the help of my boyfriend I managed to become my old self again. I then started regretting those great opportunities which I missed. My advice to everybody is to think well before taking any decisions. You might regret later on.
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    mildredtabitha

    mildredtabitha

    This statement is the truth. I have done this a few times and it helped me. I realized that I can't be good at everything but maybe I'm good at pretending lol. So for me to gain, I have to pretend I have the confidence in doing something I was initially afraid of until I succeed. It actually works.
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    augusta

    augusta

    This reminds of a time in my high school that a visitor came to give us a pep talk about being assertive and we were really shy then, after the talk she wanted to know how assertive her participants were, she said one of us should give a closing remark,some words of appreciation and everywhere was quiet Lol,she then said she was going to call one person out and the person must respond immediately,will I said unluckily for me,I was the one she pointed at.I stood up immediately and when to the podium to give a speech that wasn't even up to 2 minutes and I got a resounding applause and I have happy with my self.Little did they know I was as shy as anything,I was just faking the confidence but that day was a turning point in my life because I never felt shy again expressing myself before any audiences.
    7 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    Kakashi2020

    Kakashi2020

    I learned self defense at a very young age as a grade school student. The school I'm studying in has a lot of martial arts clubs and electives and basic Karate and Arnis or Stick Fighting is also taught in P.E. class. I got my Black Belt in traditional Shotokan Karate when I was 22 years old, I had to stay as a brown belt for 4 years because the promotion exam was quite tough, sparring full contact with 3 invited black belts for 60 seconds each without protective paddings or head gear. The rules where simole, no head and groin kicks, strikes or punches that's it. If you survive fighting the 3 black belts one by one with atleast 1 clear hit on each then you get promoted. If not then you get to fight again after 6 months. I passed with a couple of broken ribs, a fractured arm and a busted leg. After that we celebrated and that means I have to buy lots of beer and food. I also have several lower belts in Isshin-ryu Karate, Judo, Aikido and Kyokushin which I think has the hardest training. I'm also an instructor in Arnis or Kali as they call it in other places and I trained with the best Fencing Master here in the Philippines. The only drawback of knowing how to fight is that in my younger years I get into fights all the time.
    6 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    jpk0007

    jpk0007

    That is very true and I guess most of us have to do it in our life at some point or the other. I think it is always better to fake it and take a chance rather than refusing to take an opportunity. I have learned many new things in this manner. There is some hesitation initially but eventually, when you commit to something, you take up the challenge and do your best to complete it. Once you are able to fake something and complete it successfully you will be very confident to take up new challenges in life.
    6 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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    MauriceZais

    MauriceZais

    Minutes and I got a resounding applause and I have fifth grade math games happy with my self.Little did they know I was as shy as anything!
    3 years ago
    1969-12-31T19:00:00-0500

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